November 04, 2003

Oh My God

Volvo-Man was at my gym, during my boxing class.

My company gym.

He works for Company X.

We had a screaming show-down at the gym. It was horrible.

I am shaking at my desk in my sweaty boxing clothes and security, Partner Unit, and Company X is now involved. Just in time for redundancies-I am sure Company X will not appreciate this from me.

I am a train wreck.


Posted by Everydaystranger at November 4, 2003 07:10 PM | TrackBack

Hi Kids,

Thanks for the love. Believe it or not, we didn't actually scream at each other, he and I just got very, very hostile. I am working on not letting him get the best of me. I'm mad, yes, but I'm definitely getting even.

Jcrue, Jamie, Jim, Jean, Mike, Drew, Tom, Rob, and David-you made me laugh. And, David-I hope I never piss you off.

Anonymous, Tiffani and Emily-I am wondering the same things myself. It is analyzation time, and some of those big changes I have mentioned before are looming.

Posted by: Helen at November 5, 2003 10:03 AM

Wow! Thats a lot of action! And what a monumental asshole the volvo guy is, considering that nothing got damaged.

Hugs H, try not to get so mad. Don't get mad, get even.

Posted by: Melodrama at November 5, 2003 09:12 AM

You've got a lot of advice on here, not sure you need mine so if you're overloaded already just skip this. I know how it feels to get too much advice.

You probably should have kept your cool in front of the officer. My lawyer is fond of telling me that the person who committs the first offense typically gets away with it. It is the one who retaliates that gets in trouble.

If you had been calm, cool, and collected the officer may have put more credibility into your story.

But hey, that's just some 20/20 hindsight from a guy who has a bad temper and knows a lot about cops. Just keep your cool from now on, ok? More screaming sessions aren't going to help anybody. If you must get revenge, remember Machiavelli:

"If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared."

Take your time, do it right. I'm not endorsing anything illegal here, but anything worth doing is worth doing right. Personally, I feel that there is no revenge quite as great as forgivness, but I'm kind of a wussy that way.

Anyway, here's to hoping tomorrow is better than today was.

And by the way, thanks for the link. I'm not sure I'm worthy of "Important Citizen of Oz," but I certainly appreciate the implication.

Posted by: Rob at November 5, 2003 07:22 AM

So .. what now?

Posted by: John at November 5, 2003 05:02 AM

I was wondering why Volvo man followed you to work.

Fuck, what a pain. Look, I'd advise you to just walk away from the whole mess, but it sounds like it's beyond that now.

So you just have to kill him.

Volvos are known for their durability and trunk space, so here's what you do: follow him to the company parking lot one evening, wearing your most revealing bodice and schoolgirl kilt. Show a little knee. When he turns, leering, give him that devilish smile -- and whack him upside the head with a tire iron. Quickly, before he bleeds all over the concrete, stuff his limp body into the boot.

Drive to the nearest bog. I don't know if they've got a lot of bogs in Sweden, so you might have to go to France. That's still not as far as driving all the way across Texas.

Dump the Volvo. Wipe down everything before you get out, and chuck the keys into the bushes. Grab a taxi and tell them you were kidnapped by gypsies. If Partner Unit asks any questions, tell him you have been having an affair with Don.

Posted by: David at November 5, 2003 04:56 AM

Sorry H - I was not dissing you. We all want different things. Most of my friends all want that stability. I hope things work out well for you.

Posted by: anonymous at November 5, 2003 04:51 AM

H -
I have read your blog and now must - with perplexed thought, must comment. I have read your lists of what you want in a man and a woman - they look great for flippant answers and to stir up conversations. I have been with my partner unit for over 15 years. My list - honesty, trust, compassion, acceptance, friendship, integrity. Hands and hair? What if he loses all? Do we love less? Did our trust disappear? You talk of PU and BF. Does PU know of your BF and trust? Is not your PU your BF? Maybe there is a problem. Fireworks are nice - but at times we need to just be - support each other with no sex involved. You're going through lay-offs - how do you and PU support each other during this time. Are you just marking time and using each other? Is that fair to either of you?
Screaming? You look like you should have more class than that. Why did you not just look at him and as sweetly as possible say something witty about penis size and walk away? More effective. Did you feel any better? Probably not. Now you and PU, and no - PU does not get put down for frustration level when potentially his whole life is flashing before his eyes also. Look around. Doesn't make for a great story though......

Posted by: Anonymous at November 5, 2003 04:23 AM

Oh hell, I'm so sorry Helen. PU should be supporting you...and if he's not, he's not much of a partner and more of a unit. I'll be sending some good thoughts your way and I hope you can stop shaking soon...your aim will be better :-)

Posted by: Rob at November 5, 2003 04:11 AM

Screw Sweeden. Move back to the land of the free.

Posted by: Tom at November 5, 2003 03:16 AM

H- Remember what you said before, however, about how Company X already has "The List." So do whatever you want to this guy...the stuffed shirts aren't going to replace your name with someone else's just because this guy is an ass, and you tell him his face...loudly.

Buck up, little camper.

Posted by: Howard at November 5, 2003 12:15 AM

Dont have a chance to read your blog untill now and I see this.

I suggest we punk his ass. Time for payback

What will be will be. Does he have a position that can influence what happens to you at work? DOnt know else to add right now. If you need help most of us are only a flight away :)

Posted by: Drew at November 5, 2003 12:04 AM

Don't they (men) realize that they have to fix the holes. Not worth the effort or the energy.


Posted by: Tiffani at November 4, 2003 11:02 PM

Jack Daniels, Easton aluminum baseball bat, midnight, ski mask, wear black - enough said.

Posted by: jcrue at November 4, 2003 10:44 PM

That sucks. Like the others said, stay calm. It'll pass.

And hey, why are you living with someone that punches holes in walls?

Posted by: emily at November 4, 2003 10:42 PM

Christ, H. Take care of yourself. Making decisions while upset is *not* a good idea. Much love your way.

Posted by: Kaetchen at November 4, 2003 10:37 PM

How strange.
What an ass.

Yeah, what Jim said.

Posted by: Jamie at November 4, 2003 10:11 PM

You are caught in the machinery of some karmic/cosmic Rube Goldberg device.
I only hope you find the pliers soon.

Posted by: LeeAnn at November 4, 2003 09:46 PM

Do you have friends in HR?

Posted by: Sassy McSmartpants at November 4, 2003 09:45 PM

Let us go up there (pylorns and I ) to pay him a visit. We will teach him what southern boys do to men who like to mistreat a lady. I promise you It won't be pretty.

Hope it all works out for you H. Lots of huggs Helen

Posted by: agamemnon at November 4, 2003 09:38 PM

There are a considerable amount of things you can do to make that guys life a living hell.

Posted by: pylorns at November 4, 2003 09:00 PM

And it's just gotten worse. A screaming fight here at home between Partner Unit and myself resulted in him putting a fist through the wall.

These things can only ever happen to me.

Posted by: Helen at November 4, 2003 08:56 PM

make sure there are no cameras about....and then slash his tires. heh.

holy moly, i can't believe you had to see him again! yuck!

your in line for some very good stuff to happen, pronto!

Posted by: kat at November 4, 2003 08:56 PM

Are there any freeway-cams over there that monitor traffic flow like the DOT uses in the States? Maybe this creep's bullshit got caught on tape.

Video: the ultimate Punk-Card.

Posted by: Mike the Marine at November 4, 2003 08:48 PM

Hah! He can't escape his idiocy and shittyness...

Take a deep, calming breath... Now, did you put the chainsaw in the VW like you were going to? :))

Posted by: jean at November 4, 2003 07:52 PM

Holy crap. That just defies the odds.

Stay calm, stay straight on the facts. He gave a big karmic goose yesterday when he fucked with you. It's backlash time.

An ass like that will be surrounded by people who know he is an ass. You keep calm and get your story out and people will be able to see him in your version but not in his own.

Posted by: Jim at November 4, 2003 07:45 PM

When it rains it pours, huh? I don't know why, but I find this entertaining in a bad romantic comedy sort of way. Like he was having a bad day, and chose to be a bad driver for a while. The two of you are forced to be in each other's company, while fighting all the time. But, in the end, love triumphs and you live happily ever after.

Kind of a You've Got Mail with less computers and more Volvos.

Posted by: Guinness at November 4, 2003 07:42 PM
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