Everyday Stranger

It has been my experience that whatever decision one makes will be the wrong one, so don't agonize over it too much...(and don't bother switching back once you've made the wrong decision, because then that one will be wrong...)

The comments were lovely, guys, thanks. More on the sitch posted above. Drew, good thinking about the ebay tix, I hadn't even thought of that.

Pauluk pulls no punches!

And Paul US makes me feel like I have my grandfather back again. Thanks, really.

So, looks like I got here on the tail end of things! I'm with Ted K. that if they're a company that will make you lose $$$ and the holiday w/ your family, then they'll make lots of unreasonable demands on down the line.

Hopefully the phone interview now, then face-to-face in January will work out. But even if ya gotta hop to London from Tejas on the 22nd, best of luck, sweetie!

Simon: somehow, I just don't think you could pass...

If you're really stuck, send me to either the interview or for Christmas with your family. I don't think I'll trick your family but with a bit of work I might just convince the employers. You just tell me what techy things I need to say, and I'll take it from there. "Yes I invented that, it was nothing. I wrote the manual too."

But I won't wear make-up. I'll shave certain bits. But no make-up.

Looks like you did the right thing.

In a situation like this, the first thing is always to see if the interview can be rescheduled. If they are a company that will tear you across the ocean and away from family for an interview, then they are company who will probably be very demanding elsewhere.

Good luck with the phone interview. I have had a few of those, with mixed success.

Ted K.

Either way...get job or not...you will be fine Helen. You are like a reed in the wind, always returning to your original stature based on your undeniable inner strength.

This may or may not be helpful. I'll merely pass along some of the best advice I've ever received. It also happens to be (or so I thought) one of the biggest cop-outs I've ever heard, and that is this:

Use wisely your power of choice.

Kinda zen-like if you think about it. Makes me want to follow up with, "Patience, Grasshopper."

Yeah - I'd spill it - every last detail like you did here. Same amount of emotion. The fact that's a really difficult choice, but could you move the date.

A couple of considerations that lead to this.

1) Your family's real.
2) The job's a possibility.

Bank on the real, and be proactive.

Good luck.

hln

Is there no chance of moving the interview to an earlier date?

pps (Hate to be a post bore)
But "The Gift of the Magi", I was ok but i remember liking "The Ransom of Red Chief" ... my mother loved to continue the storytelling, jumping from one story to another.

Running with the pack again girl

Dont be Stupid, go for the job.your family will still be there for You, the job wont.
who knows the other cadidates family commitmants may keep him away ,the job may well be yours by default ,do you realy went to give this chance away to a complet stranger?

Didnt see the update before commenting.

Put your tickets on Ebay...sell them go on the interview and fly direct to U.S. from London that night.

But you should tell your mom. See what she says

phone interview?

oh no, best of luck, our thoughts are with you.

I hate choices. It is so much easier when someone just tells you what to do. Still, I think that the solution at hand is the right one. Go home, and if needed sacrifice the money and fly back just for the interview. Hell, you're going to get poor withour a job anyway, what's the extra month of money when spending it now may help in ending the problem?

Without knowing how much "16,000 SEK" is, I can't really judge [the job] whether you're being penny wise, but pound foolish. I'm going to [the job] refrain from advice, although this one is a little tougher than normal. [the job]. Perhaps I'll just have to [the job] resort to subliminal messages [the job].

Good luck with whatever you decide. And go with your gut. Rejection is, in the end, easier to handle than regret. And I tend to find that going with your gut leads to more rejection, but no regrets. Every really bad decision I've made in my life (and there are a few) I can see now resulted directly from my failure to do what I knew was right for me. My head got in the way of my heart.

How have things been with PU lately?

That's good news on the reschedule, H. :-)

Even without that though I thought you were in a win-win scenario. Sacrifice the job to be with the family - you're with the family. That's a win. Sacrifice time with the family for the job - you've got your dream job (as if any of us could contemplate you not getting it - sha!) and that's a win.

Impressing them with a flight in from the US could be handy. Don't bust any accounts for that though.

Pick up "the box" and go to London! We often don't realize our future was staring us in the face until it's too late.

If you go to London and it doesn't pan out I will gladly help defray the cost of the ticket. If it does pan out you'll be rolling in dough and you can buy us all a pint when we stop by to congratulate you!

Best of luck little flame.
PC

Good news-the only other applicant up for this job is ALSO out of the country on the 22nd. Now working with the recruiters to find alternate arrangements, hopefully in the form of a phone interview on the 22nd then I meet them face to face in the very beginning of January. The recruiter thinks I have the best chance of getting this job, out of me and the other candidate.

If that is not ok, I will be buying a plane ticket from Dallas to London for the day of the 22nd. My other tickets are not refundable, and I am not about to lose 16,000 SEK, I couldn't live with myself then.

When are the tickets booked for?

Would the company be willing to reschedule the interview for sometime this week before your flight to the US?

Can you afford to buy another plane ticket to the US to replace the outbound portion of your current ticket?

All things to consider I guess, but the most important one is:

Is it worth the cost of a plane ticket and a couple of days of your time going for a job you really want and that you've got at least a 50% chance of getting?

All the best whatever decision you make.

Interesting. Since there is no higher power, you must make the decision alone. On the one hand, life is quite short and a dream job only comes along once every three years or so...or a nightmare job. On the other hand you do have your family who may or may not be there in feb. Like I stated previously - life is short.

How would you feel if you went to London, then did not get the job? Of course if you did get the job, London would be fantastic after you found out. But such a dreary place to find out bad news.

So, let us face reality. There is no "right" decision because it is left to "chance." What you are looking for is a decision you can live with...

Can you live with not trying? Can you live with rejection? I would say you handle the possibility of rejection and go for the dream job. "Chances" are you will be rewarded!

jeez! what timing! have you brought this up with your family yet?

either way you need to follow your heart. those who love you will understand no matter what you decide.

and i'm wishing you all the luck in the world!!

I'm thinking good thoughts for you, whatever you decide. If it was me, I'd go for the job and hope that my family would understand. I agree with zen wanderer... your family will still be there come next month, and this opportunity won't.

You wrote - "..But the one job that I REALLY WANT, my dream job.."
and
"..So I could possibly have a new job with a big raise and a new future before Christmas. Or I could end up the year along the same miserable lines that I have experienced thus far..."

You already have your answer. Your family will still be there in January or February.....the job won't.
Good luck. metta

Well, it's your call but I'd go for the job. Your folks are likely to understand. And it also could give you mega brownie points with the interviewer ... 10 out of 10 for committment.

and sorry to sound a bit mercenary but you get a Christmas every year ... you don't know when another oppourtunity like this will come up.

what if you got the job? would u really pack up and move to London? That is probably the important question, and if the answer is yes, then... yes. hopefully I helped, instead of making a bigger mess... M.