Being with me must be hard. Not only am I wildly insecure and a bit mental about some things (dishes must be done ASAP. I turn the fuses off on the electrical outlets once done with them) but the object of my affection is subjected to weird conversations as my head synapses at the speed of sound.
Some examples:
I was looking at a London street map called the London A-Z to determine where my meeting the next day would be, while Mr Y was perusing a car catalog to determine which auto to purchase. I looked up at him.
"Did you know Jesus, Buddha, Zarathustra, and Mohammed all had emotional and spiritual break-throughs when they turned 30?"
He blinked. "You got that out of a street map guide?"
Or about my haircut. Half of me really loves it, and the other half is not sure. I sent Mr. Y a text message saying that I wasn't sure I liked it (for the record, he really likes it). He called me.
Him: What's wrong with the hair?
Me: I think it may make my head look like a butt.
Pause.
Him: What?
Me: My head. I am worried it looks like a butt.
Him: What makes you think it looks like a butt? Ohmigod, I can't believe I just said that.
Me: Said what?
Him: Butt. Only Americans say butt. What makes your head look like an arse?
Me: Just the shape. Or maybe not like a butt, maybe more like a mushroom. Not one of the exotic Asian mushrooms, just a regular mushroom. And I am not interested in my head looking like fungus.
I really do think like that.
Anyway, I shortly leave for Prague with my beloved Mr. Y, so likely not a peep from me until Sunday (although Mr. Y is aware of and a regular reader of my blog, I don't see any opportunity for an internet cafe visit).
And get this-the next time you hear from me I will be 30. That's right. The big day is tomorrow! It feels so weird to think that I will be a whole decade range older, one associated with responsibility, family, and upward mobility. This from a chick that only asks that life give her a working and trustworthy vibrator, warm-strappy sandal weather, and some arms to cuddle into on a nightly basis.
As of this time tomorrow, we will have just stepped off the plane and be heading into Prague, drunk on cheap airline champagne and heady with our first wonderful holiday together, gearing up for the adventure that we are yearning for. Mr Y, despite a ferocious row, has set the whole trip up and is looking forward to this as much as I am.
I love him at 100 miles per hour.
-H.
PS-Happy Birthday Mitzi!
PPS-go ahead. Talk amongst yourselves in my absence.
Posted by Everydaystranger at March 31, 2004 07:09 AM | TrackBackfinally got that picture in teh side to come up and i have to say I LOVE the new hair, and if my hair didnt do crazy curly things I would think about a hair cut like that!
Posted by: stinkerbell at April 7, 2004 06:34 PMI love you guys :)
Posted by: Helen at April 2, 2004 07:53 AMWelcome to Thirty-land. I have found it quite nice for the 26 days I've been in it. :)
Posted by: Lachlan at April 2, 2004 05:37 AMHappy birthday Helen,
enjoy the old city of Prague - it'll make you feel younger
Happy Birthday Helen!
Posted by: Serenity at April 1, 2004 11:36 PMH,
I'm upgrading your run-of-the-mill Birthday gift EZ Bake Oven to the very cool "Blogger Edition", luv.
http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/ezbake.shtml
Happy 30th little flame.
Posted by: Paul at April 1, 2004 09:46 PMHappy Birthday Helen!! I really enjoy popping in form time to time.
BTW, 30? Please. You're just a baby!
Posted by: gymrat at April 1, 2004 08:09 PMHappy Birthday! 30 really isn't so bad. I like the haircut and you do not have fungus-head or butt-head.
Posted by: selzach at April 1, 2004 06:09 PMHappy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful weekend! :)
Posted by: pam at April 1, 2004 03:51 PMH - Hope your Birthday was all that you hoped for and more.
Enjoy Prague, it's a beautiful city. I know I had a great time last time I was there. :-)
Happy birthday :)
Posted by: angel at April 1, 2004 02:48 PMHappy Birthday Helen! Congrats on being the big 30!
Posted by: Amynah at April 1, 2004 01:40 PMDrink of yourself. To a healthy and happy mind.
Posted by: Kyle at April 1, 2004 01:04 PMHappy Birthday, Helen. I love your blog... And that's no April Fool's joke ;-)
Happy birthday to you...
Posted by: Simon at April 1, 2004 01:55 AMHelen love, there should be some goodies waiting upon your return! Happy Birthday love and drink a vodka for me!
Posted by: Kaetchen at March 31, 2004 11:43 PMParabéns Helen! Miguel.
Posted by: msd at March 31, 2004 09:55 PMHooray! Happy Birthday Helen!!!
Have a wonderful weekend, here's wishing you tons of hot birthday sex ;)
Posted by: Laura at March 31, 2004 09:45 PMHappy birthday, and welcome to adulthood; that's what I've always called 30 and beyond.
hln
Posted by: hln at March 31, 2004 08:56 PMHappy Birthday Helen!
Enjoy Prague, its a wonderful city.
(I concur with everyone else your hair doesn't look like any sort of fungi, domestic or otherwise)
Happy Birthday! And I seen the picture of your haircut...I like it and dont see any resemblence of a butt =0)
Posted by: Dawn at March 31, 2004 07:16 PMHappy Birthday! :-D
Posted by: Brandy at March 31, 2004 05:05 PMHappy B-day!
We have a similar haircut now! I sliced mine off last week. My sig other was afraid I'd look like a mushroom head too, but now he likes it - I'm not always bitching about him putting an elbow on my hair in the middle of sex, or pulling my hair when he runs his fingers through it..;)
Posted by: Courtney at March 31, 2004 04:49 PMOne of us. One of us. One of us.
Welcome to the thirties.
Posted by: Guinness at March 31, 2004 04:14 PMYou know me to be honest, fair and unbiased. I don't like your haircut. Sorry.
Posted by: pylorns at March 31, 2004 04:00 PMHappy Birthday Darlin... Enjoy the hell outta yourself.
Posted by: KJB at March 31, 2004 03:51 PMhappy happy birthday miss helen. i hope this year is full of fun, love, laughter, joy, and dreams come true. xoxox
Posted by: kat at March 31, 2004 03:08 PMSince I jumped the gun and wished you a Hap... yesterday I'll simply wish you and Y a lovely time in Prague.
Onward and upward, little flame.
Posted by: Paul at March 31, 2004 02:51 PMHappy Birthday, Helen! My big adventure at 30? Moved to Alaska for the next 15 years... butt I think Helen is heading for warmer climes : )
Posted by: Annette at March 31, 2004 02:51 PMHelen, Happy Birthday! 30 is not so bad. I remember it fondly, lo those many years ago. Enjoy Prague!
Posted by: Howard at March 31, 2004 02:39 PMHave a great birthday, Helen!
Posted by: dave at March 31, 2004 02:25 PMHappy Birthday love...
Posted by: Tiffani at March 31, 2004 02:14 PMHappy birthday, and i do hope you two actualy can leave the room to see some of the wonderful city of Prague. If you don't, well, i'm sure you found something more interesting to do. Have Fun. Just don't get too carried away with the birthday spanks
Happy 1 day early birthday Helen!! You made it! You've arrived.
Hope it's a good one! Have a drink for me.
PS: I've been having the same trouble with the sidebar too. Increasing the size of the browser didn't fix it for me.
Posted by: Rebecca at March 31, 2004 01:37 PMHappy birthday for tomorrow Helen and have a great time in Prague, it's a fantastic place to go for a long weekend.
Solomon: try increasing the size of your browser window - if it's too small the contents of the right column will appear at the bottom of the page instead. Anything more technical and I'm afraid I can't help you!
Posted by: Gareth at March 31, 2004 01:25 PMHappy 30th. I was going to comment on your hair, butt I haven't seen it.
When I come to the site now, nothing shows up in the right column like the picture and other stuff used to. Anyone got any ideas? Do I need to change any settings or do something differently?
Posted by: Solomon at March 31, 2004 01:12 PMThank you for the birthday greeting (very much!!!), and I am hoping that your birthday turns out as well as mine is starting. Have a great trip!!!! Make sure to save lots of story-memories for us!! Love to you! Mitzi
Posted by: mitzi at March 31, 2004 12:14 PMhave a lovely birthday and enjoy every second in Prague I am so jealous. Life #6 is going so well! You really do deserve it!
Posted by: stinkerbell at March 31, 2004 08:46 AMGod grief Helen, did you tell us before the date of your birthday? damn, i knew it was soon but i am not ready!
Happy birthday petal.
Have a fab time, and i doubt anyone else thinks you look like a mushroom!
Abs xxxx
Posted by: abs at March 31, 2004 08:34 AMA butt Helen? really dear, don't you think thats just a bit cheeky? sorry if I am being an ass, butt I just had to crack that joke. =P
Hope you have a wonderful time, and a wonderful birthday!
Dane
Posted by: Dane at March 31, 2004 08:01 AMHappy Birthday sweetie! I'll miss you like fire.
(Yes, you DO know who I am. Heh.)
Posted by: Emma at March 31, 2004 07:26 AMAlthough i'm fighting the urge of sounding like a parrot:
Happy birthday and have a great time!!
Posted by: Heather at March 31, 2004 07:17 AMHappy Birthday Helen! Have a great time, enjoy yourself, and all that good stuff.
Posted by: Sue at March 31, 2004 06:59 AMhappy birthday! and here's wishing you a wonderful weekend. with no fighting. and lots of good sex.
Posted by: Reflection at March 31, 2004 06:33 AMHappy Birthday! How come so many women I 'know' are Aries? Have a wonderful time in Prague anyway!
Posted by: nisi at March 31, 2004 06:14 AMHappy birthday! Personally, I really loved 30. It made me feel more grown-up than turning 20 or 21 ever had. Have a fantastic getaway. I'm crossing my fingers we get a few pictures of Prague outta ya.
Posted by: ilyka at March 31, 2004 06:14 AMhave a wonderful weekend, and a great birthday, Helen. and hopefully, by the time you get back, the postman will have left you nice things! :)
Posted by: melanie at March 31, 2004 06:13 AM
Happy 30th. Hope you'll have a blessed one. Godbless.
Happy Birthday, dear, sweet Helen. Hold your breath, make a wish and blow.
Butt.
Posted by: emily at March 31, 2004 06:06 AMHave a relaxing, fun trip and birthday Helen!
If there is any resemblance of your head to a butt/arse, it is only the lack of sunshine effect.
Posted by: Roger at March 31, 2004 06:03 AM